Are toxic friends a thing?
I’m usually not one to talk about fake friends, toxic friends, frienemies and all that . I just thought it wasn’t my thing , I mean I haven’t experienced it yet , I’m almost too anti social to ever experience it self, so I thought.
I was still guarded though , you know trying to learn from people’s experiences but I still maintained that if we’re chill ,we good. Feel free to call me naive , it is ok .👌 But really I just had a pure heart 🤷♀️
Time has gone by and I realized I was just existing and not living , I was doing nothing , just stagnant, friends were just for chills , let’s talk ,that’s all . I don’t ask for help or anything but if you ever need help I will do my best . I didn’t really care , I would usually call my self a Lone Ranger😂
If you’re in these category ,well lucky you , your heart has never been broken by someone you least expect it from .You are also getting a little insight and would now have an idea of how you can avoid being a victim.
A toxic friend
We’d take a pause , now do a mental check of every one you call your friend. Whose calls do you dread? Who says the worst things to you in the name of scolding? Who do you think you can never call in dark times? Who do you have to change who you’re for? Are you scared of any ? Who downplays your achievements, who can never be a support system? Who keeps asking but is never willing to give ( even when they have?) all these are red flags.🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
Toxic friends are friends that drain you , they make you feel responsible for them , they are very codependent,they hurt/disappoint you and still play victim.
These are people made from trails of broken hearts and broken relationships. They float through life with this , leaving broken people behind them , the very poor victims.
Traits of a toxic friend
Honestly, you can’t spot toxicity at first sight , you barely can . Toxic people don’t show their traits immediately. I met a girl , she was cool , I liked her vibes at first , I thought she was funny and outspoken . We started hanging out , it got frequent. She always wanted my time , was getting so codependent. She introduced weird conversations, loved to have all the attention. She took pleasure in down talking people , she was also clingy , got jealous when I was with others .
I noticed these red flags but been around her for a while also told me she was damaged , she was going through things . I told my self , these could be coping mechanisms, she probably finds peace in me and I don’t mind being her peace . I mean , we’re friends right? Hopefully love would heal her heart .
After a while I realized I could not. It was rubbing off on me , I was getting sad . I couldn’t cope with the attitude anymore, they were affecting me , the talks , the presence, everything!
I decided to build a wall , set boundaries, at least I tried . Those boundaries weren’t even noticed I think 😂 because it was never respected . That was when I decided to move. I cut off from her😒
what you should know about a toxic friend
• They want the world to revolve around them .
• They do not respect boundaries hence overstep them because they believe boundaries are not meant for them , they are too powerful and special to have a limit set on them.
• They are mentally disturbed when their ideas / ways are not adhered to.
• They behave erratically to get attention .
• They lovvvveee drama .
• They make you feel worse about your issues ( if it ever gets mentioned)
• They prefer to hang it with people with low self esteem. ( they can easily prey on these ones)
• They give excuses for their bad traits and play the blame game.
These are a few red flags 🚩 you should always watch out for .
Note : unless you’re a specialist, it is not in YOUR place to treat toxicity. Guard your mental health as much as possible. Always know when to walk out.
Also reflect, point out toxic traits you’ve , no matter how minor . Make a resolve to work them .
Thank you so much for reading! Are there toxic traits I missed? Leave them in the comment section. Also , you can share your own experience with a toxic friend or friends . I am very eager to hear from you .
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